It’s a set up…

Hey, sis! I wanted to pop in really quick…I mean super quick because we all have a gazillion things going on, right?

Last week, I felt like crap. For some reason, I started missing my son like crazy.

Get this–At the beginning of the summer, I was so super excited to have a break.

I could finally go places alone, write uninterrupted, sleep as long as I wanted to, cook with spices and pick up and go without having to ask my family.

So, with all of that, who wouldn’t want alone time?

After awhile though, that fades and you want things to go back to the norm, whatever that may be. Those initial thoughts of being “alone” weren’t so exciting anymore and the feelings of loneliness crept back in. To make matters worst, I am going through a “situation” that has me feeling…eh.

Let’s get real

We don’t want to accept the alone time because we always try to fill it with people, things, places and stuff. We rush into romantic relationships, get preoccupied with social media, and find ourselves spending money on things we don’t need or in places that we have no business going to. I won’t go into the gory details of it all but what I’m saying is this sis– We do all of this extra stuff instead of embracing the alone time that God has given to us in this season.

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It’s almost as if we can’t seem to accept our singleness because we are so busy wondering what’s wrong with us instead of embracing the journey and trusting God’s plan. Nothing is wrong with you, by the way. You are a woman who has desires like everyone else.

Your alone time now maybe a “set up” for your next season

The truth is temporary alone time is necessary for deep self-reflection, purpose-building and peace. When I moved overseas, I was in a wilderness moment. It took being in that place for me to discover things about myself that I wouldn’t have recognized had I been booed up, booed up (like Ella Mai) or entangled in my destructive negative thoughts.

I talked to a really good friend of mine a few days ago who kept it 110% with me. I can totally respect that because at times, we need a good friend who will tell it like it is about our ish and convince us that it’s not as bad as it appears. Thanks, sis. I needed that.


One thing she said that was so profound was that I worry about what’s next instead of simply enjoying my now. Is that you, too?

What I did was this:

  1. Talk it out–Sometimes getting it off your chest is the best therapy.
  2. Focus on you–Think about all the stuff you wanted to do when you were in a relationship, with kids, or super consumed in life. Yeah, do that.
  3. Take care of your body– I’ve been in the gym pretty much daily during the summer months. I don’t work in the summer so its super convenient for me. Working out helps me feel better emotionally, mentally and physically. Yes!
  4. Shifting your perspective–You aren’t lonely. This season was designed especially with you in mind.  You are simply spending some ALONE time. Refocus and get centered.
  5. Get more connected spiritually–I’ve been reading more of the word intentionally because I need wisdom and guidance in my life. Can I get an Amen!

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Appreciate your alone time now because who knows…God is more than likely preparing you for what you’ve been praying about and hoping for. Are you getting positioned to be a wife, mom, entrepreneur, career changer or ministry leader?

Don’t underestimate God. Enjoy your season of singleness, sis. Appreciate where you are.

Affirmation: Everything is working out in my favor! I am where I need to be.

Read this: Psalm 34:18-19

My book is coming soon!! I just sent off my books to beta readers. So exciting. This is one of the things I’m doing in my single season. Stay tuned.





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